March 23, 2013.

I'm closed. My ear is always plugged in with music and my shade puts another layer on my vision from others. I often find myself being an observer- taking photos and staying passive in interactions. I don't have many friends (not in the same way as a high school student would say) and I don't connect or talk with my family as much as I want to. I've developed this blog to put my inner world out, and yet it's always filtered through my conscious of what to share and what not to share-

This wall within me is too high and I find myself constantly pushing people out of it. Please help me bring down this wall with me- it's lonely, cold, and full of guilt and shame in here. I want to get better. And I believe that I can (:

March 21, 2013.

"Sometimes, there is so much beauty in the world-

 I feel like I can't take it, like my heart is just going to cave in."

Strolling.

March 17, 2013.

"One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand."

- Viva La Vida


Too many thoughts on childhood memories, repressions, The Wall by Pink Floyd, Undiscovered self written by C.G. Jung, Cognitive distortion. I am literally trapped in infinite thought loop.

Physical Geography.

Flume Laboratory.

45 St. George Street. Physical Geography Building.

Examining kinematic and dynamic properties of flow.

Suburbanite.

Suburbia is interesting; close-knit community of everyone knowing everyone (whatnot), atmosphere of comparable social status with similar education level and middle class income range, and all those people running through empty roads with jogging shoes and sunglasses.

Individual houses on each road, drive, height, lane, trail, and court must hold unique anecdote and background, but not apparent enough for an outsider like me to observe.

Being in suburban helps me better understand others who were raised in this kind of atmosphere and why some would want to go back to this system after university graduation through marriage.

Rene Magritte.

The Son of Man (1964) has been my favourite painting for long time. I still remember using this as MSN profile picture since grade 9 so it's been a while for sure. Then recently I came across to this interesting commentary from the artist.

"At least it hides the face partly. Well, so you have the apparent face, the apple, hiding the visible but hidden, the face of the person. It's something that happens constantly. Everything we see hides another thing, we always want to see what is hidden by what we see. There is an interest in that which is hidden and which the visible does not show us. This interest can take the form of a quite intense feeling, a sort of conflict, one might say, between the visible that is hidden and the visible that is present. "

Breathe.

On a lazy Sunday morning, listening to 'Breath by Télépopmusik' while starring at a ceiling

and thinking 'what a lazy sunday morning', as I hear the voice whispering to just believe.